I told boyfriend no.1 I was going on a date, and he was unsure how he felt. I’ve always taken the stunted comm’s between us as a result of of how busy we both are, but actually RED FLAG, this is how the conversation went…
‘I don’t get a say do I?
Me: ‘Well, no. Not right now, but I’d be open to a discussion about it. Do you want to have a say?’
‘I just want you to be happy’
I couldn’t think of what to reply so I’ve left him on read. That was 5 days ago.
Then Boyfriend number 3 has been throwing out the red flags left, right and centre!
Constantly telling me how beautiful I am and how he has feelings for me and sending me very sappy messages.
He says he’s going to do something and then doesn’t do it … ‘I’m going to bed, good night, chat tomoz’ 1 hr later ‘I’m watching football’ I am a football coach, I understand how important football is. I do not need you to lie to me. Claims to be an amazing cook, but is always eating takeout. ???? Saying I’m not bothered about the the pubs opening, and on day 1 was in the pub!
He has four children, he sees them once a week but blames the break-up of his previous relationship because she couldn’t cope with how often he saw his kids and they could never spend any time together. Ummm, what?!
On our last date, when I was distracted, he would snap photos of me with silly filters. I’m not on snapchat. And we are not a couple!
Drinks. A LOT. See pub. And does so to cover a host insecurities. Talking of which, constantly needs reassuring that I’m into him, or want to see him and I’m already getting bored of it!
We went to pick up a Chinese one evening and whilst in town I bumped into a friend who was with two others. D went off to the bank. I didn’t know them, but they knew D. ‘Are you the new girlfriend then?’ ‘Me? No!’ When I asked D why they might think he had a girlfriend, he couldn’t explain and said he hadn’t told anybody he had a girlfriend and nobody in my town would know. As we rounded the corner back, the same woman was there. Turns out, it’s his next door neighbour!
Invites himself to my house regularly, but never invites me over to his!
I know I don’t owe him anything, but we are supposed to be going out for dinner this weekend. Now that I have typed this all out, I’m not interested in pursuing this any further. Do I feign illness? Or just explain that I have tried to match his enthusiasm but can’t. And should I point out the red flags?